For The Family Choosing Not to Celebrate Halloween Who Wonders What to Do Instead

Our family chose to stop celebrating Halloween about nine years ago when our oldest son was around five. You can read all about that in my post from last year called, “Why Our Family No Longer Celebrates Halloween.” In that post I discussed why we made a change, an overview of origins (yes, they are a bit muddy), and why I believe the Bible is sufficient for directing Christians in the area of Halloween.

Back when we stopped celebrating, there was an uncomfortable awkwardness that accompanied the decision to forgo Halloween. And the path was a lonely one at first. But when the Lord leads us down the road less traveled, He has a good purpose.

Now I see why He invited me to take a deeper look at a holiday that never quite settled in my soul. I’ve tasted and seen the goodness of God as I’ve surrendered to His leading and laid aside the peer pressure to submit to the popular way. Jesus has soothed my mind with peace and assurance that this is His way for our family, and it’s from this place that I want to offer some encouragement for how to make October 31st a day of honoring the Lord without compromising convictions.

If you’ve recently made the decision to not celebrate Halloween, you may be asking yourself this common question: So what do we do instead?

I’ve wrestled with this question, and my husband and I have had ongoing discussions about what is best for our family. I’ve also learned that Christians mean different things when they say they don’t celebrate Halloween.

So before I answer the the question of what to do instead, let me first define what I mean when I say that our family doesn’t celebrate Halloween.

The choice to stop celebrating was accompanied by a flood of questions:

Do we still hand out candy? Do we still carve pumpkins? Do we still attend church alternatives? Will our neighbors think we’re stingy Christians or just plain weird? Will other people label me as legalistic, fearful, and judgmental? Will I lose friends? Will our son (only had one at the time) resent us for not allowing him to trick-or-treat anymore?

Ultimately, I knew God was asking our family to be separate of Halloween and anything related.

And while it challenged my people-pleasing tendencies, obedience to God matters more than man’s approval. We will give an account to God alone one day.

The prophet Daniel exemplified true devotion to God and his story encourages me when I’m facing situations which require the courage to do what is right.

Daniel wouldn’t compromise. He refused to eat the king’s food or bow down to anyone but the One True God. He was persistent in prayer even though it meant a death sentence at one point. He was a man of conviction and courage and prayer, who was beloved by God and blessed for his faithfulness to the Lord.

When I look to the Word of God and the examples it provides, I can rest in knowing that:

It is not legalistic to be discerning.

It is not living in fear to heed conviction prompted by the Holy Spirit.

And it is not overreacting to call out evil and refuse to fellowship with it.

It is wise.

I am not better than anyone else. I am not perfect in my choices. But like Daniel, I want to care more about pleasing God than people.

Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence and if anything worthy of praise, think about these things.

Phillipians 4:8, nASB

It is my desire to point my kids in the direction of things that are true and pure and lovely. I just don’t see a redeeming quality to Halloween because it rejects this description by glorifying the very opposite.

Therefore, my kids don’t dress up and go trick-or-treating (and they don’t care), we don’t put up Halloween decorations (but we still appreciate the beauty of fall), we don’t carve jack-o-lanterns (but we still enjoy treats like pumpkin bread), and we don’t hand out candy (because it’s still participation and it’s impossible to avoid disturbing costumes).

This is where God has led our family, and I realize Christians vary in their convictions. My intention is not to condemn anyone or tell you to do things exactly like us. My heart is to bring awareness to something I once was blind to, and to encourage fellow Christians who hold similar convictions that they are not alone.

Ultimately, my advice is to search the Scriptures, pursue God in prayer, and listen to Him.

So now that you know what I mean when I say we don’t celebrate, let’s get back to the question of what we can do instead.

If you’re raising kids and live in a neighbor where trick-or-treating is happening around you on Halloween night, it’s hard to get away from. The reality is that this is the one and only holiday where people come knocking on your door.

Some Christians see this as an opportunity to share the gospel, and choose to hand out candy and/or gospel tracts, whereas some Christians prefer to refrain from all participation.

If you’ve chosen not to participate at all, it may feel awkward. You may even hear that condemning voice which says you’re being an unloving Christian for not answering the door.

But let me encourage you that God’s voice is not one of condemnation, and there is more than one way to share the gospel and the love of Christ. As mamas, we have a responsibility to protect our children and lead them in a way that honors the Lord, and sometimes we need to model for them what it means to live set apart even when it’s difficult. So if your conviction is to not answer the door, then don’t. That doesn’t mean you’re a cold Christian and that also doesn’t mean you have to hide inside with all the lights off.

In fact, I’ve realized this can still be a fun and meaningful night for our family without partaking in anything Halloween related. And while we keep our porch lights off, our indoor lights remain on if we are home.

So here’s a few ideas of what we can do instead on Halloween…

Have a Worship Night

If you and your family will be home on Halloween night, you might consider having a worship night. Pray together. Read Scripture together. Sing some worship songs or hymns together. Keep your focus on Jesus who is the Light of the World.

Enjoy a Movie or Game Night

Make it a fun night! Cook up a pot of chili and bake some cornbread, or have a pizza night and special snacks. Watch a movie together or play your favorite games.

Hang Out With Friends or Family Who Share Similar Convictions

Spend time with family or friends who share your conviction of not celebrating Halloween. Eat a cozy meal together, warm up some hot cocoa, and just enjoy fellowship with one another.

There are other Christians who don’t celebrate Halloween. When we first stopped celebrating, I felt so isolated and alone. But as I began to speak about it, I discovered there are other families like us. So be encouraged that this doesn’t have to be a lonely day.

Learn About the Protestant Reformation

October 31st is also Reformation Day. This is a great time to learn more about Church History by studying the Protestant Reformation–the day Martin Luther nailed 95 Theses on the door of the Castle Church in Wittenberg, Germany.

We have a few related picture books we read, and there are lots of ideas on the internet of activities you can do and fun snacks you can make.

One year we packed shoes boxes for Operation Christmas Child. One year we prayed by name for each of the Israeli hostages of October 7th. Maybe you know someone who is sick or going through a hard time. Create some homemade cards to brighten their day.

There are so many ways to help people in need and it doesn’t have to be overcomplicated.

Closing Thoughts…

The first year we stopped celebrating, we stayed home and watched a movie but kept almost all of our lights off. It felt strange and like we were just trying to get through the night. The following year I went into labor on Halloween and my son was born the next day, so we were otherwise occupied (and that’s another whole story of God’s faithfulness in answering my prayers, but I’ll save that for another time).

After that year, I started to think and pray more about how the 31st might look different for our family so that it wasn’t such a dreaded day. And in His kindness, the Lord began to show us the way, connect us with families with similar convictions, and bring peace to my heart. Having something to do together as a family that is meaningful has helped buffer some of the uncomfortableness of this time of year.

While October is still a challenging month in some ways, it doesn’t weigh me down as much and I face it in prayer knowing we’re in a spiritual battle. It breaks my heart to see so much evil and death on display, but I pray that I’m a light and I pray for those captive to the darkness to have an encounter with Jesus.

If you also choose to not celebrate, I’d love to hear in the comments how you handle the night of Halloween. Does your family have any traditions? How do you handle this time of year?